When I was a little girl there has always been the preconception of how my life would be. Be married with two or three kids, a house. The whole nine yards right? Not so much. My marriage didn't start out the normal way and sure as heck did not end the normal way. One of the things I look back on was there were all the signs there pointing to disaster. Did I just choose not to see the writing on the walls? Who knows and maybe it was all in God's plan. God wants you to glorify him even in the midst of tragedy. Knowing that he will help you with the outcome of it all. My faith has been shaken and broken in a way that I never thought I would or could get back to him. Turning away from God instead of to him.
Have you ever gotten news that brought you to your knees. I mean knocks the air out of your lungs. Not being able to breath or speak. Eyes tearing up that makes the whole world look like a blur. That is exactly how I felt when I got the news of my then husbands infidelity. He was in the military at the time and had to go away for business. Thinking back now I can't even remember what it was for, all I know was that he was gone for a month and half. He missed Halloween that year with us, but he what was the difference he was always missing events or holidays due to his job. You just learn that is life with the military. I remember being so proud of him and all his accomplishments, when all along he was going behind my back. I got a text while I was at work from a number that I didn't recognize. It asked if I wanted to go to the first doctor appointment. At first I thought they were confused, then I text my husband and asked if he knew what it was about. Shortly after I received a text from my husband asking if I could take the rest of the day as a personal day.
I remember pulling into the drive and thinking this can't be true. It's some horrible joke someone is playing on me. Not my husband, not the person I have tried to help support with his career, multiple deployments, being by myself and raising our son. He was distraught pacing back and forth in the living room. When I looked at him I saw it in his eyes. There was no going back, then he told me the dreaded truth. He had cheated on me. Not just physical with one woman, no he also fell in love with another woman. Wasn't sure if our marriage was worth fighting for. My world was shattered and came crashing down around me. How was I to forgive? How was I to let go of what he did? Why would God let something like this happen to me? Then I got the phone call a few days later. My mother was diagnosed with stage three ovarian cancer. I told you bad things come in three's.
I want to hear from you guys. Have you ever had something happen to you that you didn't know how to handle? How you were going to come out of it?
Please see the link also for my mothers GoFundMe account! I will get into her cancer situation and what is going on with her later on!
